I guess a lot has happened since I last posted. I've been wanting to post for a while, but not felt like I had too much to say... and I was feeling lazy about posting and more like I would rather spend time on other areas of my life. Here's the scoop. I got the job! Starting Sept. 14th, I will be working as a therapist on a maternity leave position. It is a great job, great experience, and great timing. I am ready to be done my current job. The people are great, but the job is sometimes boring. This new job is only 3 days per week, and yet I'll be making double what I was making before. That is pretty good to me. Gives me more time to focus on other priorities in life too (which I really need to do right now).
So, DH is away right now on a week-long camping/hiking (intense trail hiking) trip. I really didn't want him to go. I didn't know how I would make it through this week without him. However, I seem to be doing pretty well so far. I actually found that when he left, I felt like a weight lifted and I became SUPER excited about some time alone! I feel like I just haven't had time alone at our house for a long time. We came back from holidays, which were pretty "people" full, I work with people, and when I come home, DH is always there (which is great, but sometimes I just need some time alone). So, I've taken on crazy amounts of projects and organizing getting "ready" for fall and the coming of a student, and visiting bro and sis-in-law (and new baby niece). I am actually crazy excited to meet my (first) baby niece in a few days. Somehow, I just feel like it will be a therapeutic time. I am pretty sure I will bawl my eyes out when I meet her (and maybe other times after that), but I already know there will be a connection and I cannot wait to see her, and hold her, and cuddle her!
Now, as for me... 2nd round of clomid did not seem as bad. Actually, I did not feel nearly as "crazy" as the first time around. Maybe holidays and everything helped with that. And now I'm in "new job mode" so that is driving my mood a bit more. The last few days is when I felt the most moody and emotional. Other than that, it's been pretty smooth sailing. Even ovulation was not as bad as last time. Now I am at day 29 and no AF yet, but I am pretty sure it's coming. My temp dropped .2 this morning (it is still high though - this whole time since ovulation has been higher than normal) and I had very light spotting 2 days ago (normally comes 2 days before AF). So, we'll see what the rest of today and tomorrow brings. At this point, I think we really need to focus on the general health/wellbeing of DH. He is more stressed than I. He needs to lose more weight than I. His "optimal health" probably needs the most work. Even though his tests were all fine, I feel this might be a big part of things. I also got my blood work done again. My ferritin is up! Hooray! That is probably why I am feeling better about life and things too. I still feel quite tired and a bit burnt out. I'm not just where I'd like to be with energy, but that's okay. So, that's a bit of an update. The latter part of this week is dragging on... and I am now ready for DH to be back (and there are still 3-4 days to go). I'm lonely, but don't feel like reaching out to people. I am tired but don't want to rest. I want to organize and nest, and spend time with my puppy (whom I really love and has truly become my baby). If I love her this much, I can only imagine what it will be like to have an actual baby to love. There you have it!
