Time for ME

Recently one of my friends from a baby group mentioned how a lot of us are starting to get our identities "back" after having kids.  And I suddenly realized that it is true.  The shock of having twins threw me for a loop and there was a while I thought I never would be myself again.  I still think that my definition of my "self" has changed dramatically since the twins were born.  However, since they turned a year old, I find life returning to "normal" in some ways.  Maybe it's because they sleep through the night and I feel quite rested most days.  Maybe it's because I'm not nursing any longer and there is a sense of independence again.  Maybe it's just a natural progression in having a baby. 

The thing that I have found, however, is that even though I have more time for myself, I really don't know what to DO with myself.  It's either that the activities that I used to do take too much time and I can't really get into them, OR I just don't want to do those things anymore.  I think I wrote before about how many of my hobbies were domestic activities.  Now I get to do those activities all the time, just not with the leisure attached.  It is a rush get-this-done-before-the-babies-wake-up kind of thing.  So it's not quite the same amount of enjoyment, even though I am feeling fulfilled in using those skills to provide for my family. 

In the meantime, I still do need time for myself.  So here are some of the things that I do these days to recharge and feel "normal" in the midst of a crazy life.

1. Exercise!  This is huge for me!  If I have the time to work up a real good sweat or be outdoors on a beautiful day it is a bonus.  But even when I don't, a 30 minute walk pushing the stroller is great to settle my thoughts and help me breathe easier for the day.  I love our family walks, which we try to do 1-2x per week.  We often Ergo the boys down the trails to the beach and back around our little town center, stopping for a treat along the way.  The dog loves it when we all walk together too!

2. Coffee and reading.  Most of my reading honestly is catching up on my social media sites and briefly checking blogs, though I do want to start reading books again, especially before bed.  It's just so daunting on where to begin.  I used to LOVE reading but I'm totally out of the loop and don't even know which authors I would like anymore.  If you have any suggestions, please let me know!  Oh, and this only happens when the babies are napping and I don't have other pressing matters to attend to.

3. TV night with my babe (the big one).  Hubby and I love to cuddle up a few nights a week and catch up on shows or maybe watch a movie if we're not too tired.  Before I was a parent I knew so many parents who never watched movies or TV anymore, but I find this is our lifeline!  Maybe it changes when the kids go to bed later, but right now we need it.  Some nights we are sooo spent and all we want to do is light a fire in the woodstove, grab some junk food and zone out to something that makes us laugh.  I actually think it has connected us as a couple, despite what it may seem like.

4. Coffee date out with a friend, sans kids!  Okay, this has only happened like one or two times, but it has been incredible when it did happen.  I want to find a way to make this happen more. 

5. Massage, hair appointments and the like.  I started having regular monthly massages as part of my self-care as a counsellor when I started working, and now I just keep it up since we have coverage for most of the year.  I just love those days!  I get regular haircuts at a hip salon that makes me feel young and fresh (hehe).  I would love, love, love to start acupuncture again at some point, but my acupuncturist has moved farther away and I don't know if I can afford the time for the drive and the appointment.  We'll see.  Especially if we do decide to TTC again...

I'd say that's a pretty good start right about now.  How about you?  What do you do to recharge?