From there I was wheeled right up to the antepartum unit, admitted, and put into bed. It was all a whirlwind! When I started contracting the next morning it just carried on. Finally yesterday I was able to gather my thoughts a bit.
I am so glad I came for this appointment when I did. I even had to advocate for it and push my clinic to call again and again. I'm glad the doctor did an internal check because from the regular ultrasound my cervix looked nice and long. I am glad to feel safe in a hospital that treats preemie twins and not have to worry about having them flown in during a crisis. I am even happy to have some "restrictions" so that I don't have to make the decisions about what I can and can't do.
What is hard is being away from my home during this time. We are not ready! I know now why people suggest you have everything ready for twins by 24-28 weeks. We haven't even painted the nursery! I feel like I am going to come home with two babies to an unorganized house. And its not like I'll have the time to correct it once I get there. That is hard for me to accept but I don't have a choice. I know it will get hard as it gets more boring being here in the hospital. Its only been 3 full days. I have managed so far but I know it won't be easy.
Then there are the worries about the babies coming too early. While this is not something I am super worried about, I know that I am naive and unaware of the difficulties it may hold. I am trying not to cross that bridge until I need to, but even as I spoke to the doctor about c-sections it made me cry.
Anyways, this is a rambly post as I wrote it at various point during the day, but it gives a snapshot of where my emotions are at right now. Surprisingly, I am holding it together okay. I don't know how, apart from the prayers of many and the grace of God.
And to end on a good note, I was moved to a private room today! This will be my new home for the next little while.
I am also glad you're in a hospital prepped for preemies even though it's unfortunate that you have to be in that situation. But I can't imagine what's in your head right now!
ReplyDeleteThe good thing is that even if you were organized it wouldn't matter. I thought I was so organized but when the babies came it turns out I had no idea what I needed (even though I read all the posts and whatever). So as long as your supplies are there when you get home, you will manage. And hopefully they won't be born soon, so you will have time to arrange for deliveries of stuff to your house from the "comfort" of your hospital bed.
Hi! You don't know me :) but I've been following along with your blog only a brief time. I wanted to add my 2 cents, since I spent 5 weeks on bed rest with my twin girls. First of all, the first week or so will be the hardest! Getting used to nurses and doctors coming in atl hours isn't easy on anyone. Do NOT panic, after the first week or so it will get better as you settle into a routine. Second, try to make your room as home-y as you can. I had a clothes hamper, pics of my family, flowers, a plastic drawer unit with snacks, my own hand soap (this was so nice as compared with the hospital stuff), a comfy throw for my bed, etc. I also tried to get dressed and put myself together every day (not easy as I was only allowed 15 minutes a day out of bed!). I'm not sure if this is possible, or what kind of restrictions you have. I just know even putting on a little makeup made me feel more like myself...and getting dresses helped separate my days. Otherwise, it can just feel like one loooong day in the hospital. My other suggestion is to contact your local moms of multiples group. I did not do this until after the girls were born, but I wish I had done it sooner! My local group will try and match you up with another mom who is on bed rest, sometimes even one in the same hospital! This could have been an awesome source of support. Also, I don't know about your local group, but mine has a stash of preemie clothes that they lend out to those who need them. Our girls were born at 34 weeks, and we only used preemie sizes for 3-4 weeks...so that would have saved us some money! Also, try not to worry too much about the nursery if you can keep from it. Ours wasn't completely done yet either when I was admitted (premature labor at 29 weeks) but after I was released the girls remained in the NICU for a couple of weeks, so I was able to finish it in between visiting them. If you plan on painting, though, definitely make sure this is done now before the 3 of you come home! Sorry for writing a book here, just wanted to provide some support and ideas. You are doing great - keep those babies cooking as long as you can. I was having regular contractions starting around week 28...and managed to keep them in another 6 weeks (released from bed rest 34+0, water broke within hours of coming home!). Let me know if you need any other info or help!
ReplyDeleteHmm... Forgot to give you my email address. Carri.gillispie@yahoo.com
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